Claire’s Meaning of Life: ∞.0

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source: zenwave

Nobody knows what they’re doing.

It took me nineteen years to figure that maxim out.

Consequently, this past year has been different to the ones previous, because I’ve been trying a new theory called “I don’t give a f%ck” (I’m joking, I’m still 35% insecure, 55% awkward and 10% memes, but I’m trying fam). This means I’ve been taking a few more risks, trying some new things and being (slightly) more open with people.

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Kevin G knows what’s up (source: giphy)

It isn’t as bad as it sounds. It’s more a ‘no regrets’/’what’s the worst that could happen’ kind of mindset. Because even though I basically navigate life like I’m blindfolded and hearing impaired, everyone else is pretty much the same (no offence)- albeit the lessons they have learned from experience. So, the only way I can compete with that is to gain life experience. Yall with me so far?

With this in mind I’ve compiled some new rules for myself. I mean rules in the way of values, almost in a religious sense. In the same way a Christian might coordinate their life via the Ten Commandments or a Buddhist might adhere to the Five Moral Precepts. None of them are my own, I should disclaim at this point. I’ve read widely on life; what it is, what it means, how to deal with it. The following are merely a selection of my collection.

This list is a compilation of values which I think are important. I’ve named it The Meaning of Life:  ∞.0, (where  ∞ = infinity, which is the mathematical concept that discusses any phenomenon which is larger than any number or beyond logical constraint, for any non-mathematicians reading this) because it never really had a starting point, and it will certainly never end – for me, at least.

Apparently it’s a Sagittarius thing.

The Meaning of Life:  ∞.O

1.You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take

I took this from some inspirational shit I found on Instagram. I like it because it kind of puts a really cheesy, fake spin on something that’s really negative in your life. Is this thing that I really want to happen actually going to happen? 99.99999% of all relevant factors say no, but hey! Let’s give it a shot!

*cue hours of crying when the inevitable happens*

(this brings me to point 2)

2. If no-one dies, it’s not an emergency/if you won’t die doing something, that something is a good idea

Yes girl, you’re upset because part 1 was a total flake, but you’re alive. There’s still food in the fridge, there are Harry Potter parodies on YouTube to watch, and somewhere there’s a sweet little cat falling asleep, dreaming of you to come and pick him up and love him forever and be his mum. He is waiting. Seriously, it’s all good. No-one died.

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source: giphy

3. Every shitty thing in life makes a wonderful piece of writing

Chalk it up to experience. Write it all down, keep everything, so that in a few months time when you sit back and think ‘CLAIRE WHAT THE F*CK WERE YOU THINKING??’ you have a 17-page analysis on why you made that decision. You may be a dramatic, overthinking idiot, but at least you aren’t completely barren of mental process. Small comfort?

I am not joking about the 17 pages by the way. True story.

I’m psychotic like that.

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source: giphy

Seriously though, if you have a perfect, fairytale, white-picket fence life, what are you going to write? A shitty, shallow, meaningless empty novel about empty walking emotionless dumb people (yes, I am describing the trash some people call Twilight)?

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Summary of the entire Twilight film franchise (source: giphy)

Summary:

  • MAKE BAD DECISIONS BECAUSE IT IS SO FUN
  • Kevin G is Jesus

(Also don’t like Twilight)

Thank-you for your attention

Claire ❤

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